Jake: Guess what I want to be when I grow up?
Me: What?
Jake: I want to work in a bank.
Hannah: Are you going to be a bank teller?
(pause)
Link: Or a bank robber?
1 year ago
Showing posts with label hannah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hannah. Show all posts
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Presidential power
Tonight we were having a fairly casual dinner. Jake was making his hot dogs, Hannah was eating what she had made, and Link and I were eating fondue. Because everyone kept coming and going I was reading my book while we were at the table.
Hannah: I thought you said we're not allowed to read at the table.
Me: You're right, I did. But I'm the mommy so I can break the rules sometimes. When you're a mommy you can do the same thing.
(pause)
Hannah: Well what about Daddy? Doesn't he have any say?
(I look at Lincoln)
Link (laughing): Not really.
Me: Daddy is sort of like the Vice President. He has a title but no real power.
Hannah: I thought you said we're not allowed to read at the table.
Me: You're right, I did. But I'm the mommy so I can break the rules sometimes. When you're a mommy you can do the same thing.
(pause)
Hannah: Well what about Daddy? Doesn't he have any say?
(I look at Lincoln)
Link (laughing): Not really.
Me: Daddy is sort of like the Vice President. He has a title but no real power.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Sunday, December 5, 2010
The youngest child's Christmas lament
Yesterday we put our Christmas tree up. As we do every year, the kids put up the ornaments while I string the popcorn. Lincoln supervises the kids and hangs the popcorn garlands as I finish them. Of course this year our jobs overlapped as the kids wanted to help me string the popcorn and hang it too. I'm thinking in a year or two Link and I can just sit back and let the kids do all the work.
The one and only thing I put on the tree is a red elf that I had when I was a kid. They still sell these in the stores but what I remember about the elf was it was the "special" thing we put on the tree each year.
Jake: Can I put this on the tree? (holding up the elf)
Hannah: No! That's Mommy's. Mommy hangs that every year.
Jake: Why?
Mommy: Because every year when Mommy and her sisters were decorating the tree we fought over who got to put the elf on the tree and because Mommy was the youngest - something you're familiar with Jake - I never won. So now I get to put it on the tree every year.
Jake: That's not fair!
Mommy: Don't worry. One of you will inherit it when I'm dead.
The one and only thing I put on the tree is a red elf that I had when I was a kid. They still sell these in the stores but what I remember about the elf was it was the "special" thing we put on the tree each year.
Jake: Can I put this on the tree? (holding up the elf)
Hannah: No! That's Mommy's. Mommy hangs that every year.
Jake: Why?
Mommy: Because every year when Mommy and her sisters were decorating the tree we fought over who got to put the elf on the tree and because Mommy was the youngest - something you're familiar with Jake - I never won. So now I get to put it on the tree every year.
Jake: That's not fair!
Mommy: Don't worry. One of you will inherit it when I'm dead.
Auntie Rachie's owl collection to the rescue
Hannah: What is Hooter's?
Me: It's a restaurant with a lot of owls in it.
Hannah: I think Auntie Rachie would really like that place.
Aunt Debbie: I think Uncle Kevin would probably like it more.
Me: It's a restaurant with a lot of owls in it.
Hannah: I think Auntie Rachie would really like that place.
Aunt Debbie: I think Uncle Kevin would probably like it more.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
This girl is too smart for me
This week the kids and I are down in Arizona visiting my parents. For some reason while we were riding in the car today Jake brought up the topic of their first words. This is a conversation that we've had many times before but today it ended a lot differently.
Jake: Do you know what my first word was?
Me: Yep, ball.
Jake: And what was Hannah's first word?
Me: Boom.
Hannah: Yeah, but is that really a word or just an onomatopoeia*?
(Both Mom and I whip our heads around to Hannah....)
Me/Mom: What!?!
Hannah: The spelling of something the way it sounds.
(silence)
And for those of you playing along at home, Webster's defines onomatopoeia as "the naming of a thing or action by the vocal imitation of the sound associated with it (as buzz, hiss)"
I have no idea what her second word was so if we're not classifying boom as an official word anymore we're in trouble.
Jake: Do you know what my first word was?
Me: Yep, ball.
Jake: And what was Hannah's first word?
Me: Boom.
Hannah: Yeah, but is that really a word or just an onomatopoeia*?
(Both Mom and I whip our heads around to Hannah....)
Me/Mom: What!?!
Hannah: The spelling of something the way it sounds.
(silence)
And for those of you playing along at home, Webster's defines onomatopoeia as "the naming of a thing or action by the vocal imitation of the sound associated with it (as buzz, hiss)"
I have no idea what her second word was so if we're not classifying boom as an official word anymore we're in trouble.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Lost in translation
I realize the last half dozen postings or so have been about Jake. It's not that Hannah isn't doing anything funny or exciting, it's just that Jake never shuts up so of course he gives me endless amounts of material.
Like this one.
Sunday the four of us went shopping at Kohl's. I needed to pick up a silver chain necklace and Hannah loves to try out all the different perfumes. She found one that was really nice smelling and she sprayed it on me. It smelled wonderful which was a good thing because, while I wouldn't have had any problem saying no if I didn't like it, it made it easier for me to sort of buy my daughter a bottle of perfume named "Provocative Interlude". I like it too so I bought it for myself but she can borrow it. This way it's actually my perfume but she can borrow it without saying that she personally owns a bottle of Provocative Interlude.
Because, as Link said, that just seems wrong.
(Okay, so some of this story actually was about Hannah.)
But we're not talking about bad parenting choices, we're talking about things that Jake says. While Hannah was trying out all the different perfumes he wanted to do it too. Of course we were trying to tell him that men wear cologne and women wear perfume.
But this is what he took away from the conversation.
(As we're pulling out of the parking lot.)
Jake: When do I get to wear man-fume?
Like this one.
Sunday the four of us went shopping at Kohl's. I needed to pick up a silver chain necklace and Hannah loves to try out all the different perfumes. She found one that was really nice smelling and she sprayed it on me. It smelled wonderful which was a good thing because, while I wouldn't have had any problem saying no if I didn't like it, it made it easier for me to sort of buy my daughter a bottle of perfume named "Provocative Interlude". I like it too so I bought it for myself but she can borrow it. This way it's actually my perfume but she can borrow it without saying that she personally owns a bottle of Provocative Interlude.
Because, as Link said, that just seems wrong.
(Okay, so some of this story actually was about Hannah.)
But we're not talking about bad parenting choices, we're talking about things that Jake says. While Hannah was trying out all the different perfumes he wanted to do it too. Of course we were trying to tell him that men wear cologne and women wear perfume.
But this is what he took away from the conversation.
(As we're pulling out of the parking lot.)
Jake: When do I get to wear man-fume?
OMG....This kid NEVER shuts up
Jake talks.
A lot.
And I mean a LOT.
The other day he fell asleep in the car on the way to Kristen's soccer game. When he first woke up he started babbling incoherent sentences. I wasn't even sure he was speaking English. All we knew was that he was awake and therefore he had to be making noise.
Have I mentioned he talks a lot?
Since I walked in the door about an hour ago Jake hasn't been quiet for more than about 10 seconds at a time. He's either talking about school or Dinosaur Train or orange water (OJ mixed with water) or balloons. Seriously, he just talks.
And talks.
Jake: Today, on the bus ride home, it was REALLY quiet today.
Me: Oh yeah?
Link: Why, were you asleep?
(laughter from me, Link, and Hannah)
Hannah: I know! Let's play the quiet game!
(Lincoln, Hannah and I immediately stop talking.)
Jake: HOLD ON! HOLD ON! HOLD ON! Ready? Uno, dos, tres....
(silence for approximately 20 seconds)
Jake: (as he bites into his taco and starts chewing) Num, num, num, num
(The 3 of us burst into laughter again.)
Hannah: You should blog about that. I might blog about that. That is definitely blogworthy.
A lot.
And I mean a LOT.
The other day he fell asleep in the car on the way to Kristen's soccer game. When he first woke up he started babbling incoherent sentences. I wasn't even sure he was speaking English. All we knew was that he was awake and therefore he had to be making noise.
Have I mentioned he talks a lot?
Since I walked in the door about an hour ago Jake hasn't been quiet for more than about 10 seconds at a time. He's either talking about school or Dinosaur Train or orange water (OJ mixed with water) or balloons. Seriously, he just talks.
And talks.
Jake: Today, on the bus ride home, it was REALLY quiet today.
Me: Oh yeah?
Link: Why, were you asleep?
(laughter from me, Link, and Hannah)
Hannah: I know! Let's play the quiet game!
(Lincoln, Hannah and I immediately stop talking.)
Jake: HOLD ON! HOLD ON! HOLD ON! Ready? Uno, dos, tres....
(silence for approximately 20 seconds)
Jake: (as he bites into his taco and starts chewing) Num, num, num, num
(The 3 of us burst into laughter again.)
Hannah: You should blog about that. I might blog about that. That is definitely blogworthy.
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Words of wisdom
Today at lunch we were talking about how the kids needed to clean up their rooms this afternoon. Hannah said that she wasn't happy about having to pick up her room because most of the mess in her room was from Hunter and Jake last night. (Not that we believe her to be blameless.)
We told her that she could solve that problem by not allowing them to play in her room.
Hannah: I don't like letting them play in there because they make a big mess but I like letting them play in there because they're a lot of fun.
Link: Yeah....sort of like having kids.
We told her that she could solve that problem by not allowing them to play in her room.
Hannah: I don't like letting them play in there because they make a big mess but I like letting them play in there because they're a lot of fun.
Link: Yeah....sort of like having kids.
An October picnic
Today is a gorgeous fall day and the kids decided to put on a picnic lunch for the family. They made the sandwiches themselves, got every one's drink orders and laid out the blanket. Even Leo had his food and water bowl outside although, as you'll notice in the pictures, he would have preferred to be eating the people food.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Men are such babies
Earlier this week I went to the Paper Store to buy a card for Lincoln for our anniversary. At the checkout was this little book designed to look like a police officer's ticket book. It had a list of violations that you could charge your kids fines for including whining, not cleaning their room, leaving dirty laundry on the floor, swearing, etc. Fines range from fifty cents to about $2.50.
I thought it was hilarious.
The kids didn't.
Yesterday Hannah got a warning violation - meaning she didn't have to actually pay the $4.50 in fines - posted on her kitchen board (more about that later). This morning Jake left his dirty laundry all over the floor and I told him that he had to pick it up.
Me: Jake, you need to pick up your dirty laundry. That's what Hannah got a warning violation for yesterday.
Jake: What?
Me: Yeah, you know, a ticket? Part of her fine was for leaving dirty laundry around. I'll give you one if you don't pick up your dirty laundry.
Jake: Seriously? SERIOUSLY? You would seriously do that to a man with a cut?!?
And then he proceeded to show me the world's smallest cut on the back of his hand.
Nice try Bud.
I thought it was hilarious.
The kids didn't.
Yesterday Hannah got a warning violation - meaning she didn't have to actually pay the $4.50 in fines - posted on her kitchen board (more about that later). This morning Jake left his dirty laundry all over the floor and I told him that he had to pick it up.
Me: Jake, you need to pick up your dirty laundry. That's what Hannah got a warning violation for yesterday.
Jake: What?
Me: Yeah, you know, a ticket? Part of her fine was for leaving dirty laundry around. I'll give you one if you don't pick up your dirty laundry.
Jake: Seriously? SERIOUSLY? You would seriously do that to a man with a cut?!?
And then he proceeded to show me the world's smallest cut on the back of his hand.
Nice try Bud.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Memories and Regrets
Over the last few months I have worried about how my depression has affected my kids in many different ways. I must admit, one of those ways is the fact that I haven't been blogging about my kids and the funny things they do and say. I love going back and choosing a random month from the archives and reading about something the kids did that I had completely forgotten about. The fact that so many memories haven't been recorded in the past few months makes me incredibly sad. I know that despite the misery of the past few months we've had some great times as well. At best I manage to write up a quick recap on Facebook but I haven't committed much to keeping up with the blog. I just haven't had it in me and that makes me sad.
A few weeks ago, during one of our regularly scheduled Friday night Mexican dinners with my friend Tracy, I somehow started thinking about how when Jake was first born Hannah used to always want to play "baby on the doorstep." It was a big elaborate game we would play where she would pretend that she found Jake on the doorstep and we had to bring him in, decide to keep him and then I would always suggest naming him Henry which she always rejected. That game went on for months and yet it was something I haven't thought about in years. I didn't have the blog back then so of course I never wrote it down anywhere and I'm glad that I can do it now. It does make me sad though to think of all those other memories that I never recorded the past few months.
Another memory that I had forgotten about until that night was "Hecuba Buttmunchkin". When Hannah was little we always used to call her buttmunchkin (and still do sometimes). I used to tease her that her real name was Hecuba Buttmunchkin and she would get so mad at me. I told her that it was what was on her official birth certificate and she wouldn't be able to convince me otherwise. It used to get her so riled up and always made me laugh.
You always think, in the moment, that you'll never forget that funny joke or special thing that the kids did, but you do. Even when it's a game you played for months and months and you figure you'll be playing that same game until they're old and gray, you don't realize until years later when you're sitting around eating enchiladas that one day that game just stopped.
And that's just depressing (pun intended).
A few weeks ago, during one of our regularly scheduled Friday night Mexican dinners with my friend Tracy, I somehow started thinking about how when Jake was first born Hannah used to always want to play "baby on the doorstep." It was a big elaborate game we would play where she would pretend that she found Jake on the doorstep and we had to bring him in, decide to keep him and then I would always suggest naming him Henry which she always rejected. That game went on for months and yet it was something I haven't thought about in years. I didn't have the blog back then so of course I never wrote it down anywhere and I'm glad that I can do it now. It does make me sad though to think of all those other memories that I never recorded the past few months.
Another memory that I had forgotten about until that night was "Hecuba Buttmunchkin". When Hannah was little we always used to call her buttmunchkin (and still do sometimes). I used to tease her that her real name was Hecuba Buttmunchkin and she would get so mad at me. I told her that it was what was on her official birth certificate and she wouldn't be able to convince me otherwise. It used to get her so riled up and always made me laugh.
You always think, in the moment, that you'll never forget that funny joke or special thing that the kids did, but you do. Even when it's a game you played for months and months and you figure you'll be playing that same game until they're old and gray, you don't realize until years later when you're sitting around eating enchiladas that one day that game just stopped.
And that's just depressing (pun intended).
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Like mother, like daughter
Hannah has updated her blog from Seattle. Check it out: http://bananasnow.blogspot.com/2010/07/point-defiance-zoo-is-place-to-be.html
A very exhausted girl....and dog
Hannah stayed with my sister Debbie and her husband Mark this weekend. They have a yellow lab puppy that followed her everywhere but after a long, busy weekend I think both of them were completely worn out.
I love the fact that he's laying on her legs like Leo does but he probably weighs about 50 lbs more than Leo. What a difference!
Coast to Coast
I know that technically we've been separated by an entire continent from Hannah ever since she left, but it hit me tonight while both kids are off on vacation without us, that they are literally spread out coast to coast. Hannah is in Washington State. Jake is in Maine. They couldn't possibly be any more spread out then they are.
Lincoln and I have enjoyed a very lovely, very peaceful weekend without the kids and the only question we have is, "When can both kids start going to Seattle for the summer!?!"
Friday, July 23, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Well that didn't work out the way I thought it would
Jake: Mommy, you didn't come look.
Me: I'm sorry Jake. Mommy was just finishing up something in the office.
Jake: It was just in the kitchen.
Me: I know. I'm a bad Mommy. Maybe you should get rid of me.
Jake: And get a new one?
Me: Sure.
Jake: Hmmm, like who?
Gee, that wasn't quite the response I was looking for from him. Usually when I tease Hannah about that she throws her arms around me and says "No! I love you. You're the BEST Mommy."
Me: I'm sorry Jake. Mommy was just finishing up something in the office.
Jake: It was just in the kitchen.
Me: I know. I'm a bad Mommy. Maybe you should get rid of me.
Jake: And get a new one?
Me: Sure.
Jake: Hmmm, like who?
Gee, that wasn't quite the response I was looking for from him. Usually when I tease Hannah about that she throws her arms around me and says "No! I love you. You're the BEST Mommy."
Friday, July 16, 2010
Into the vortex
For the past week Hannah has been in Seattle and Leo, every now and then, seems a little confused as to her absence. I was telling my sister-in-law, also named Diane, about this and she said he probably wonders what she did to get sent away.
We always use the side door of our house to go in and out. I can probably count on one hand the number of times we've used our front door before today. We did have to use it today though because I painted the breezeway floor with bond adhesive before we laid down the linoleum. Most of the day we had to use the front door, including when Leo went up to Di's doggie daycare. Lincoln was standing on the front step, with the door open, calling his name but Leo just stood there and looked at him. This is exceptionally strange since Leo usually just sits by the door anxiously awaiting the trip up to Di's house so that he can play with the other dogs.
Me: It was so funny this morning. When Link went to bring Leo up to your house he sat by the front door and didn't know what to do. He didn't seem to want to go out that door.
Diane: He's probably thinking "Is that the door Hannah went out?"
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